20 ridiculous skills you should never include on your resume
A sense of humor is great, but your resume real estate is precious.
You might be well-versed in Microsoft Office or consider yourself social media savvy, but are you proficient in dodging potholes? And do you really want to work for a company that can’t appreciate your margarita-making skills?
As far-fetched as it might seem, these examples aren’t too far off from the types of skills some folks like to list on their resumes. Recently, people have been adding skills like “butter” and “hugs” to their LinkedIn profiles…and actually getting endorsed for them. In fact, there are quite a few jobs posted that are looking for candidates with a sense of humor.
But how far is too far? Can your ability to “make the redemption cup” in a game of beer pong really get you a job?
As great as it might be to show off that sense of humor, Monster Careers Expert Vicki Salemi says your resume isn’t the place to do it.
“Consider your resume like your college diploma — pristine, prestigious and to the point,” Salemi says. “Instead, you can leverage your cover letter as a chance to show off your hilarious skill set.”
Still, because it’s generally best to stick with skills that are job-related, transferable and adaptive, we’ve rounded up some of the more questionable abilities people have saved for Twitter—rather than recruiters—to enjoy.
Skills gained through work experience
On my resume under "skills":— Pegah Y (@ohpegah) June 23, 2016
Switching tabs from Facebook to something work-related really fast every time my boss approaches
I set up two people at work and they went on a date last night.— Kristen Boxman (@kboxofjoy) June 26, 2016
Brb adding "Match Maker" under the special skills section on my resume.
Skills that are downright amazing
Replacing all my work skills with real life skills on my resume. "Can eat a large pizza alone," "9 years of liquid eyeliner experience."— Becky Tanton (@BeckyTanton) March 31, 2016
Just changed from jeans to shorts on the bus without anyone noticing. #ResumeSkills— Anthony Colon (@Anthonyishere) June 10, 2012
#resumeskills: ability to recite all the words to the Kanye West classic "Gold Digger"— melissa (@mellcath) September 24, 2013
I've come to the realization that I play a mean tambourine #ResumeSkills?— Lexi Jason (@lexi_jason) April 23, 2014
I suddenly realized...I speak cat! I need to add this to my resume. #ResumeSkills— ImTheMissy (@ImTheMissy) May 24, 2014
#ResumeSkills able to drive in the rain, wearing only one contact lens— Lauren Phillips (@yipeeitslaurie) June 25, 2014
Can load a Pez dispenser all in one go. #resumeskills— Jeremy Owen (@BurlyJer) December 7, 2014
I'm really good at picking up those last few grains of rice with my chopsticks #resumeskills— Fredonia State Dad (@TheJollyJustine) May 12, 2015
Skills that almost hit the mark
*typing resume*— Allie Stevens (@allieegatorrrr_) February 27, 2016
-easy to work with
-basic conversational spanish
-really good at hiding double chin with the snapchat bar
(My resume)— dahlia (@heythere_dahlia) May 10, 2016
Skills: limited Spanish proficiency, Microsoft Office, Adobe, getting toothpaste on every article of clothing I wear
Skills to be taken with a grain of salt
Job interviewers love confidence. So when I write a resume I write "AF" after all my work skills— Narin Vann (@NarinVann) June 8, 2016
Recent College Graduates!— Paul (@PaulJMalcore) June 2, 2016
Make sure to add "Can talk about humus during work potlucks" to your resume.
Employers love those soft skills!
Skills actually sent to recruiters
Just had someone send in a resume at work & listed under special skills he listed "slightly handsome." That's either ingenious or horrible.— Jason Fry (@frydorov) April 21, 2016
instead of listing dates for work in a resume I received, the applicant wrote: Guess what I did in 2008? #resumeskills— Cat (Cheryl) Aulakh (@2ndActHealth) August 31, 2010