Best Ways to Handle Gossip in the Workplace

By Jamie Thork, Monster contributor

In any office, there will always be people who speculate about coworkers and their motives, but when it turns into rumor-mongering or outright lies, gossip in the workplace can wreck careers and reputations. Finding out that you share an office (real or virtual) with people who talk behind your back can be devastating. It can also take a hit on team cohesion, morale, and productivity.

Blame human nature. The fact is, people like to gossip—just take a look at any magazine rack or celebrity-centric website. Workplace gossip especially can be cathartic and a way to commiserate and bond with your coworkers. As the saying goes, misery loves company.

Obviously, office gossip can have some big repercussions. Your relationships with your peers can take a hit, but so can your own reputation. Workplaces must be professional environments.

The standard test for whether or not something can be considered gossip? If you wouldn’t say that something about a person in their presence, then it should be avoided.

This includes comments on social media and on digital channels like Slack, Gchat, and email. Check with your organization’s code of conduct if you think someone may be violating it with online gossip.

Of course, you may still face some challenges since you can’t really control what comes out of your coworkers’ mouths. However, there are moves you can make to handle gossip at work strategically when it reaches your ears.

To get yourself back on track when rumors start to fly, consider these approaches.

Address the Instigator

When you find out people are talking about you in an intrusive or inappropriate way, you can address it directly. Gossip might even be a type of verbal harassment.

If you’re truly looking to establish yourself as someone who has no interest in participating in office gossip—or if you’re dealing with a habitual gossip—you’ll have to be direct about it. Consider addressing the instigator in private to express your displeasure. Approach your gossiping coworker in a non-confrontational way and politely but firmly ask them to not talk any further about you or whoever is the target of their gossip.

If you’re concerned about upsetting your coworker and risking alienating them take a delicate approach by saying something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, it sounds like a tough situation, but I’m just not comfortable talking about a coworker.”

It might feel awkward, but by making your position clear, your coworker will likely find someone else to complain to.

Offer a Solution

Why do people gossip? Boredom, sure. But when someone talks negatively about a coworker, it’s also often out of frustration. That said, there’s also a good chance the gossiper has a legitimate issue. If that’s the case, your best move is to acknowledge your colleague’s frustration, and then help create a solution.

Let’s say a colleague says to you, “I can’t stand John. He’s always late getting me what I need to do my work on time.” A helpful response from you: “That sounds frustrating, but I’m sure John isn’t doing it intentionally. Have you guys talked about it? I bet you can work things out.”

Vacate the Premises

Even if you don’t contribute to the conversation, you’re still guilty by association if you’re listening to someone else gossip. Don’t be a bystander.

Have an exit strategy prepared so you can politely remove yourself from the gossiping. Keep it simple. Say, “I’m sorry, I forgot I have to send an email,” or excuse yourself and go to the restroom.

Granted, this tactic may not be a long-term strategy (especially if the person gossips a lot), but it gets you away from the scene unscathed.

Change the Conversation Topic

This move requires some finesse. Steer the conversation toward a safe, innocuous topic, like movies (“I saw a preview for XYZ movie, and it looks great. Do you think you’ll go see it?”) or sports (“Did you catch the game last night?”). When in doubt, compliment the gossiper, ask to see pictures of their pets, or find out what their weekend plans are.

The Upside of Workplace Gossip

While gossip is often hurtful and not productive at all, there are sometimes ways to make it useful. Hearing gossip about yourself in the workplace is not enjoyable, it does you the favor of alerting you to a perception that can spread and multiply if you don’t take action to rebuke it.

Granted, you obviously don’t need to pay attention to everything said around the proverbial water cooler. However, it’s useful to look for patterns in your perceived behavior and gather important insights about how people see you. Perception is a lens through which others see reality, and their desire to work with you will be affected by what they see.

Report It

Gossip is a distraction at work, but it can take a darker turn if it crosses the line into harassment. The majority of employers expressly prohibit harassment and make a clear note of this in their employee handbook. If a gossiper doesn’t stop after your confrontation, it might be considered harassment. Document it and don’t hesitate to bring in HR if there’s a problem you can’t solve on your own.

Find a New Place to Work

Nobody who is doing their job to the best of their abilities should have time for gossip in the workplace. Ready to find a new company to work for? Make a free profile on Monster. We can send you job alerts, connect you to great recruiters in your industry, and send you career advice to help you deal with whatever else comes your way.