Is it OK to date a client or vendor?

There’s a lot of advice out there about the ethics and wisdom of dating your co-workers, but what about the other professionals you work with as part of your job? Is it OK to date a client or vendor?

I reached out to experts to find out what you should you do if find yourself making a personal connection with someone your company does business with and what kind of ethical considerations should you be aware of.

3 key questions

There are three primary factors that are “morally relevant” if you, as an employee, are considering dating a client, vendor or other non-co-worker you interact with as part of your job, says Matthew Brophy, an assistant professor of philosophy at High Point University who teaches business ethics to undergraduate and MBA students.

He says you should ask yourself these three questions to evaluate the situation:

1. Does the relationship pose a conflict of interest with either party’s fiduciary duty as a professional? Putting your personal feelings before your business relationship is a mistake, and introduces a conflict of interest between your own feelings and your duty to the company’s success. As an employee, your interests are the company’s interests and you need to consider whether your strong personal feelings are going to interfere with your business interests.

2. Is there a power-differential where the dating could be considered a coercive, quid-pro-quo relationship? Power differentials don’t only have to do with the position you might have at a company. Differences in status or income can put you or the other person in a bad position, and make it difficult to executive business decisions without undue influence.

3. Will the dating relationship reflect poorly upon the company or any associated stakeholder groups? Even if there isn’t a conflict of interest, it’s important to understand that even the perception of a conflict can reflect badly on the individuals involved and the organizations they work for. Some organizations have rules against dating clients or vendors in order to avoid even an impression of impropriety.

It’s important to consider these factors if a relationship seems to be deepening. “Only after these three primary questions are satisfactorily answered can a dating relationship be acceptable in the business context,” says Brophy. And even if the questions are addressed, a relationship between an employee and a vendor or client might not be advisable.

Other factors to consider

If your company has a policy about conflicts of interest that could apply to a romantic relationship with a client or vendor, it’s likely similar to a policy regarding intimate relationships between co-workers. The purpose of these kinds of policies, says Beth P. Zoller, legal editor at XpertHR, is to make it easy to avoid any conflicts of interest. These conflicts “may affect the workplace and other employees and compromise the employer’s own legitimate business interests.” When you work closely with others on projects or toward a common goal, it’s easy to feel like you’re invested emotionally in them. It’s important to remember, however, that your personal interests may not align with your professional interests and your employer’s interests, so you should take it slow if you think a relationship might be turning into something more than business as usual. Check your company’s policies and work to do the right thing if you’re considering a romantic relationship with a client or vendor.