Favoritism at Work: Signs, Impact, & What to Do About It

Skipped over for big projects or left out of decisions? Favoritism at work can affect your career growth, well-being, and trust in the workplace.
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16 min read

What You’ll Learn
- Favoritism at work is preferential treatment based on preferences or relationships, not job-related factors like performance or qualifications.
- Common signs your boss is playing favorites include unequal access to high-profile assignments, recognition, flexibility, advancement opportunities, and exceptions to workplace rules.
- Favoritism generally isn’t illegal on its own, but it may raise legal concerns when it involves unlawful discrimination, harassment, or retaliation.
- If you experience favoritism at work, document specific examples, advocate for yourself, and follow your employer’s process if you decide to file a formal complaint.
If you feel like your boss plays favorites, every assignment, promotion, or workplace decision can start to feel personal. Being repeatedly passed over or treated differently can affect more than your day-to-day work experience. It can shape your confidence, career growth, and decisions about what comes next.
This guide explains what favoritism at work looks like, why it happens, its impact, when it may become a legal concern, how to formally complain about favoritism at work, and when to consider moving on.
What Is Favoritism at Work?
Favoritism at work is special treatment given to certain employees based on personal preferences or relationships rather than job-related factors. It can be intentional or unconscious and may affect how managers or other decision-makers treat employees.
Favoritism isn’t the same as rewarding strong performance. For example, assigning your top-performing employee the company’s biggest account based on their results isn’t favoritism, but giving the account to a less-qualified employee because they’re a manager’s friend could be.
Related forms of workplace favoritism include nepotism, which favors family members, and cronyism, which favors friends or close associates.
7 Signs of Favoritism at Work: Is Your Boss Playing Favorites?
The signs your boss plays favorites can show up across assignments, opportunities, recognition, flexibility, access, and accountability.
Common signs of favoritism at work include:
- 1.
The same employees get the best assignments. Certain employees consistently receive high-profile projects, desirable assignments, or work that gives them greater visibility and opportunities to advance.
- 2.
Certain employees get more access to the boss. Your manager regularly includes the same people in important conversations, meetings, or decisions while leaving similarly positioned employees out.
- 3.
Poor performance is excused for certain employees. Some employees face few consequences for missed deadlines, mistakes, or subpar work that would draw criticism or corrective action for others.
- 4.
Praise and recognition aren’t distributed fairly. A manager consistently highlights certain employees’ contributions while overlooking comparable work or accomplishments from others.
- 5.
Certain employees receive special perks or flexibility. Some workers are routinely granted preferred schedules, time off, remote work flexibility, or other privileges that aren’t available to employees in similar circumstances.
- 6.
Some employees are left out of important opportunities. Qualified employees may repeatedly miss out on training, development opportunities, promotions, important meetings, or chances to take on greater responsibility.
- 7.
Workplace rules aren’t applied consistently. A manager may enforce attendance, performance, conduct, or other workplace expectations strictly for some employees while allowing favored employees to ignore them.
Any one of these situations may have a reasonable explanation. Multiple signs occurring consistently, especially when the differences can’t be explained by performance, experience, responsibilities, or other job-related factors, can point to a broader pattern of favoritism.
Why Does My Boss Play Favorites? 9 Possible Reasons for Favoritism at Work
Bosses may play favorites because they naturally gravitate toward people they trust, relate to, or work with frequently, and those preferences aren’t always conscious.
Some common reasons for favoritism include:
- Personal connection: Managers may naturally gravitate toward employees they like, relate to, or enjoy working with.
- Established trust: Managers may repeatedly turn to employees they already trust, giving others fewer opportunities to prove themselves.
- Similarity bias: Managers may unconsciously favor employees who share their background, personality, interests, or working style.
- Familiarity: Employees who work closely with a manager or interact with them more often may receive more attention and opportunities.
Favoritism can also be part of overtly unprofessional or toxic workplace behavior, including:
- Personal relationships: A manager may knowingly give better treatment to friends, relatives, romantic partners, or other employees they have close relationships with.
- Loyalty and agreement: Some managers may reward employees who support their decisions, don’t challenge them, or consistently take their side.
- Office politics or self-interest: A manager may favor employees who increase their influence, provide useful connections, or help advance their own career.
- Punishment or retaliation: A manager may treat an employee less favorably after the employee challenges a decision, raises a concern, or otherwise falls out of favor.
- Bias or prejudice: Preferential treatment can reflect biases related to appearance, background, identity, or other characteristics. If it’s connected to a legally protected characteristic (outlined below), it may raise discrimination concerns.
The Impact of Favoritism in the Workplace
Favoritism can hurt workplace trust, employee engagement, and career opportunities by making people feel that performance isn’t the main factor behind rewards or advancement.
Consider these findings from Monster research:
- Poor management and workplace conflict contribute to stress. Monster’s 2026 State of Workplace Mental Health Report found that 33% of workers cite poor management as a top source of workplace stress, while 28% cite workplace conflict.
- Workplace relationships can influence advancement. In Monster’s 2024 Personality Hires Poll, 45% of workers said they believe it’s easier for personality hires to advance because of their relationships with executives.
- Bad managers can drive employees away. Monster research on workplace relationships and management found that 56% of workers have left a job primarily because of a bad manager, while 55% have stayed longer because of a great one.
These findings don’t measure favoritism specifically, but they show how poor management, workplace relationships, and perceived opportunities can affect employees and their careers.
Is Favoritism Illegal at Work?
Favoritism itself generally isn’t illegal. It can become a legal issue when employment decisions are based on a protected characteristic or involve conduct prohibited by employment law, such as unlawful discrimination, harassment, or retaliation.
Federal protections include:
- Title VII of the Civil Rights Act: Prohibits employment discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, and national origin.
- Age Discrimination in Employment Act (ADEA): Protects workers age 40 and older from age discrimination.
- Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA): Prohibits employment discrimination based on disability.
For example, consistently giving better assignments to a close friend may be unfair but not necessarily illegal. Denying opportunities to employees because of a protected characteristic, such as a disability or nationality, could raise concerns about unlawful discrimination.
State and local laws may provide additional protections. If you believe favoritism involves unlawful discrimination, harassment, or retaliation, consider speaking with an employment attorney or contacting the appropriate government agency.
Can You Sue for Favoritism at Work?
Ordinary favoritism, by itself, generally does not provide a basis for an employment lawsuit. A potential legal claim may arise when the preferential or adverse treatment is connected to unlawful discrimination, harassment, retaliation, or another legally protected right.
If you suspect favoritism is connected to unlawful treatment, document specific incidents, including what happened, when it occurred, who was involved, and how other employees were treated. An employment attorney can evaluate your circumstances and explain which federal, state, or local protections may apply.
Note: This information is for general informational purposes and isn’t legal advice.
How to Deal With Favoritism at Work: What to Do If Your Boss Plays Favorites
If you’re dealing with favoritism at work, first confirm you’re seeing a pattern, then document specific examples, advocate for yourself, and decide whether to escalate the issue.
How to Complain About Favoritism at Work: 6 Steps
If you’ve decided to formally complain about favoritism at work, document specific examples, follow your employer’s reporting process, and explain how the behavior is affecting your work rather than focusing on your manager’s motives.
It’s understandable to worry about retaliation after speaking up, but don’t let that stop you from raising a legitimate concern. Document what happens before and after your complaint to protect your interests if your treatment, responsibilities, opportunities, or working conditions change.
Follow these steps to formally report favoritism:
- Step 1:
Read Your Employee Handbook
Check your employer’s policies for reporting workplace concerns. Look for instructions on who to contact, how to submit a complaint, and any documentation you’re expected to provide.
- Step 2:
Document Specific Examples
Write down specific incidents that demonstrate the pattern you’re reporting. Include dates, what happened, who was involved, and any relevant emails, messages, assignments, performance records, or other documentation.
Keep your personal notes somewhere you can access independently of your employer’s devices or accounts, while following company policies and protecting confidential or proprietary information.
- Step 3:
Decide Who to Talk To
Follow your employer’s reporting process to determine who should receive your complaint, such as your manager, their supervisor, or human resources.
If your manager is an appropriate contact and you haven’t raised the broader issue with them, consider starting there. If you’ve already tried or don’t feel comfortable approaching them, use another reporting channel.
- Step 4:
Explain the Impact, Not Just the Favoritism
Explain how the behavior is affecting your work, pay, responsibilities, advancement, or working conditions. Connect your examples to concrete outcomes rather than simply saying the situation feels unfair.
Also be clear about what you’re asking for. You might request a review of how assignments are distributed, clarification of promotion criteria, more consistent application of a workplace policy, or another specific change that addresses your concern.
- Step 5:
Put a Formal Complaint in Writing When Appropriate
If you’re making a formal complaint, follow your employer’s process for submitting it in writing. Clearly describe the behavior, provide your strongest examples, explain the impact, and state what you’d like the employer to review or address.
- Step 6:
Know What to Expect After You Report Favoritism
Your employer may ask follow-up questions, review records, or speak with other employees as part of its response. Continue documenting relevant events after you report the issue, including any changes in your assignments, treatment, responsibilities, or working conditions.
If you experience possible retaliation after making a complaint, document what happened and follow your employer’s process for reporting that concern.
How Do You Know When to Stay or Walk Away?
Consider staying if your employer takes your concerns seriously, the situation improves, and you still have opportunities to grow. If favoritism continues to limit your career, affects your well-being, or gets worse after you speak up, it may be time to consider quitting.
Consider staying if:
Your manager listens to your concerns and takes them seriously.
You receive clear expectations for earning assignments, promotions, or other opportunities.
Treatment becomes more consistent after you speak up.
You still have meaningful opportunities to grow and advance.
The situation isn’t significantly affecting your well-being or career.
Consider leaving if:
Your concerns are repeatedly dismissed or nothing changes.
Favoritism continues to limit your pay, responsibilities, visibility, or advancement.
Your manager can’t give you a clear path toward the opportunities you want.
You experience retaliation or worse treatment after raising concerns.
The situation is consistently affecting your mental health or making you dread going to work.
Move Forward If Favoritism Is Holding You Back
Experiencing favoritism at work can teach you a lot about yourself, personally and professionally. Speaking up may strengthen your self-advocacy, problem-solving, and conflict-management skills, or it may give you the clarity to recognize when change isn’t coming.
Either way, how you respond can shape what comes next, from improving your current situation to finding a better opportunity elsewhere.
Frequently Asked Questions
What’s the difference between favoritism and nepotism?
The difference between favoritism and nepotism is who receives preferential treatment. Favoritism is a broad term for giving someone preferential treatment for personal rather than job-related reasons. Nepotism is a specific form of favoritism involving family members or relatives.
Is favoritism the same as discrimination?
Favoritism isn’t necessarily the same as discrimination. A manager may unfairly favor an employee because of a friendship or personal preference without violating discrimination laws. Favoritism may become a legal concern when employment decisions are based on protected characteristics, such as race, religion, sex, national origin, age, or disability.
How do you prove favoritism at work?
To prove favoritism at work, document a consistent pattern of unequal treatment. Record specific incidents, dates, people involved, and differences in assignments, opportunities, recognition, discipline, or other treatment. Keep relevant emails, messages, performance records, and other evidence when appropriate and permitted by company policy.
Can you get in trouble for reporting favoritism at work?
Employees may face workplace tension after reporting favoritism, but making a good-faith complaint doesn’t necessarily mean they did anything wrong. Legal protections against retaliation may apply when an employee reports conduct protected by employment law, but not necessarily to every complaint about unfair treatment. Employees should follow their employer’s reporting procedures and keep their complaint factual and professional.
How common is favoritism in the workplace?
Favoritism in the workplace is difficult to measure because studies define and measure preferential treatment differently. Related research suggests that workplace relationships and connections can influence how employees perceive career advancement, but that doesn’t mean every difference in treatment is favoritism.